take off your pants.

(via redsuspenders)

bahahhahahahahahaha

even if it’s just beef jerky.

ranga-sauce:

ranga-sauce:

kayla-jane:

Pam Beesley: If I have to do this, based on stereotypes that are totally not true and I do not agree with, you would maybe not be a very good driver.
Dwight Schrute: Oh man, am I a woman?

The Office 1x02

so true.

funniest religion ever.

textsfromlastnight:

(+44): mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
(+44): “and then my dad would be all like ‘hey mike, where’s the remote?’”

-Stranger than Fiction

(via mumblelard)

(via marywachsmann)

(via shaneguiter)

redsuspenders:

was there for 7 and a half hours
ended up not getting selected
i don’t have to do it for another 3 years though

i did this and made seventy bucks.

the whole time i had to make small talk with my new boss about giant food stores.

i earned that seventy bucks.

redsuspenders:

another lulz fbook group

never liked bagels.

(via flickflickflicker)

ranga-sauce:

johnwilkestooth:

“THIS IS OUR NEIGHBORHOOD! HOW COULD THEY TEAR IT DOWN!? HOW CAN THEY TURN OUR SMILE INTO A FROWWWWN!”

I literally sing this all the time

i’m not a jinx either.

robot-heart:

Jillian Michaels Ripped Up Abs Mini (via ExerciseTV)

This woman terrifies me. I tried one of her hour-long work outs tonight. I got about 14 minutes in before I felt like throwing up. Granted, I’m beyond out of shape and I’d eaten half a tub of cookie dough beforehand, but… I’m so excited about doing this every night.

DO IT. it’s easier than ab ripper x.